ARTIST STATEMENT

Sitting Pretty

Magic can appear magical for an audience but to the preforming magician it is a practiced trick - true sorcery is a spontaneous spell that is guided rather than a practiced trick. It is not uncommon for one of my respected peers to say to me, “They just don’t get you as we artists do” or “Not sure what the audience sees but you are an artist’s artist”. It seems that many of my contemporaries have the market and the business of art figured out while I still shuffle through the shadows of doubt and discoveries.

 Now, I don’t claim to have magical powers, that would be a formulaic approach. I claim to have an honest approach, an honest magician whose sleeves are only filled with arms and nothing else. Formulas are like recipes, if you follow the rules the results turn out in a desired way; a predictable way. The first time I saw a magician pull a bunny out of a hat my mouth gaped open, the second time I figured out the trick, by the third time I was bored stiff. Some painters are like a one act magician; they pull the same rabbit out every time. I get it, nobody cherishes the humbling experience of staging an act gone wrong in front of a full audience, and nobody likes a sitting pretty performance. Art that moves people is one with awe, with real danger of sorcery, and not of a tamed trick. 

I want to experience every painting as a game with death. A do or die outcome that pushes me forward with many failed humbling attempts. When I finish a work that feels great, I feel as though I cheated death for that act. A blank canvas is perched on my easel, a brush gripped in one hand, and a look of discontent is posed on my face. There is nothing wrong with my abilities or confidence. Painting this picture was going to be a performance act that I had perfected time and time again. It is like an overly trained circus entertainer whose sole job is to jump though a death-defying feat that only brings excitement to spectators. You know that you will be unscathed. The dull expression is the lack of fear of cheating death.  If I'm not afraid, I’m painting the wrong work. Fear is the obstacle holding you back from reaching potentials beyond your capabilities. Painting is the vessel that we use to push ourselves through to reach higher levels of artistic mastery and personal wellbeing.